Enjoy The Moment

I originally wrote this for a blog called The CKC Moms. It's a group of women I thankfully met when I first became pregnant. And even though it was just through the internet, they kept me sane all that time and well into new motherhood. I wanted to re-post here because I feel it's something many moms can relate to, plus I just kind of like it. I hope you do, too.

I was recently talking with a friend who only has about a month to go until her baby is born. She was saying how uncomfortable she is, understandably, and how she would love the baby to come early. Instead of giving her a lecture about how it's best for babies to be born at 39 weeks, at least, I just told her, "Try to enjoy it." She looked at me like I was crazy. "How can I enjoy it when I'm so uncomfortable?" Again, understandably. But despite how difficult it may be to get around, the aches and pain she's feeling, the anxiousness and excitement to get labor started, this is a very fleeting time in a woman's life, though I know how it can feel like an eternity.

If you can put that uncomfortable state aside, many things will never be the same after your first child is born. I remember distinctly trying to soak in alone time at the end. My husband was off on his guy trip before the baby came, and I was home alone with the cat, watching movies, enjoying the peace and quiet. Having those moments will be few and far between from here on out. I also tried to enjoy the time alone with my husband. After the baby was born, I felt like we were just roommates for a while, trying to survive together. Taking care of a newborn leaves very little time for much else. I remember missing my husband as I was trying to navigate new motherhood. Things have evened out a bit, and now we can relax together after the baby is in bed, but we'll never be able to go back to how it was. My house will probably never be as tidy, my cat will never get as much affection as she used to, I won't be able to hang out with a friend at the last minute, and spontaneity has all but gone from my life.

Before I start to sound too bleak, the good news is, this new life is amazing. With its challenges, great joy has come. With its tears, unexplainable happiness. All I want to do now is hang out with my little family. Watching my child grow is one of the best things I could have ever hoped to experience.

I will never be pregnant with my first child again. I will never again have the "new parent" feeling. And if and when I get pregnant again, I will do my best to relish the time together as a family of three before we become a family of four. When I look back on the difficulties of the newborn stage, it's all a blur. I know it was tough, but here I am missing it at times. But it's taught me to enjoy the moments with my son, big or small, happy or sad, easy or tough and hopefully, I will always carry that with me.

The exciting life and times of a Mom

It's sort of ridiculous what makes me happy these days, aside from the obvious, like my son and husband. I ordered a new shower curtain on Amazon last night and I can't wait for it to come tomorrow. By the way, it's a boring, ol' clear shower curtain. I remember when C was a little baby, I "splurged" and bought this white, rubbery watch at Target. It made me sincerely happy. Ordering and buying toys is also a big hit for me. For my son, not so much. His reaction is hardly ever what I hope for when I present him with said gifts, but he's 8 months old, so I'll cut him some slack.

A few weeks ago, I went out sans baby to see my husband play in a couple bands. My friends were there, it was late, we were in a club. I felt a small semblance of who I was at one time. But, getting home and going to be very late, I still had to be up early. The baby does not care. And to be honest, as much fun as I was having, I still felt off. Obviously, my life has changed. The things that excite me has changed. My idea of fun has changed. I like me better now, and I like what I've learned being a mom so far, as short of a time that it's been. Being at home with my little family, going for walks and to the park, it is truly satisfying. And so are shower curtains.